Gwen, part one of the Llwellyn triology
by Atheia
Summary: meet Gwen bestfriend of Lilly Evans and discover what happens when love is found in the strangest of places, Snape and own character
1. Chapter 1

**Gwen**

AN: Part one of the Llewellyn trilogy, set in the marauder period contains some Lilly and James pairing I owe nothing but the Llewellyn family

Chapter One

The passageway is narrowed by the presence of a trunk and a woven cat basket. The basket is home to one contentious kitty Jigsaw, who lives with rather than belongs to one Gwen Llewellyn, whose trunk packed for the new school year is littering the otherwise immaculate hall.

Jigsaw meows crying for freedom.

"You love it when you're there," Gwen smiles tickling his whiskered cheek. Every year for the past six years it's the same thing, maybe Jigsaw just doesn't like her cage but muggles are a funny lot and she has to get a train to Kings Cross from Three Bridges. Her father could easily arrange a car from the Ministry, but he wont and she is too young to travel magically so train it is.

The Llewellyn estate is huge, a three hundred year old building of stone not unlike the castle where Gwen attends school. She closes the door, her father is not even there to see her off but it doesn't surprise her. Her father the great Aurora and recently in the running or Minister of Magic, is hero worshipped by the whole of the wizardry world except his own daughter.

The journey to Kings Cross was uneventful, she is rapidly becoming accustomed to the stares from the other passengers. The delay because of leaves on the rails however are just irking her good nature, and she is on the Gryffindor Quidditch team with James Potter she is used to being irked.

At least as soon as she steps foot on to the platform her best friend Lilly Evans is waiting with a tight hug. "How was your summer?" She asks as a way of a greeting.

"Uneventful," Gwen answers.

"Petunia is just horrible, you're lucky that you don't have any siblings." Lilly sighs, her sister is always mean to her because she is a witch. To Petunia magic is a really bad thing, or so she says truth is she's jealous of the extra attention put on Lilly by their parents. Gwen who has never been showed any type of attention from her father can symphonise, not that she'll tell Lilly that.

"Dad always wanted a son," she says shrugging.

"I have to go to the Prefects carriage," Lilly smiles pardoning her self. Gwen watches her leave longing to be going with her, but instead her and Jigsaw make their way into the carriage taken up largely by her fellow Gryffindor Quidditch team.

She sits by the window, it provides a good place to stare out in silence rather than staring at Sirius Black. Her crush on her fellow chaser is an annoyance, nothing has ever happened and nothing ever will but still she fancies him something chronic.

Everyone is already comparing grades scores and holiday stories, like who went to what games and the Keeper who went to Bulgaria for no reason except his mum likes toy boys.

"Being even quieter than usual Gwen," James teases. He roughs up his dark hair, to look like he just got off his broom.

"Pardon el Captain," she smiles. "I didn't do a lot this summer saw the Tornadoes play a couple of times, went to Romania to hunt Vampires with Father and stayed at home on my tod."

"You went vampire hunting?" Sirius asks, implying that she is a bit too delicate to rough it.

"Well you know Father, never too young to start and he said that I would learn more through being there than reading it in a book."

"Even while you Know Who is out there?"

She shrugs, "Didn't say Father made sense only he was doing some work for the Ministry and I had to tag along."

"How did your exams go?" James asks, she knows he's fishing for information about Lilly but best friends don't gossip about each other.

"Five O's, three E's and an A." She says turning back to the window.

"Wow, five O's?" David, the muggle born Beater whistles.

"I am the cleverest witch of my age," she sighs. Everyone says that about her, they expect great things from her and she isn't sure if she can deliver.

"How did Evans do?" James asks.

"Well," Gwen answers. She knows that Evans like her excelled but loyalty prevents her from giving too much away. "And yourself Potter? Hope your little sport didn't stop you from getting on with your practical?"

James smiles and everyone knows that she's talking about the performance he made after the Defence Against the Dark Arts theory. She didn't know that she could feel sorry for Severous Snape.

"Did about the same as you, didn't you Prongs?" Sirius asks, they have strange little pet names for each other.

"Just about Padfoot, oh look it's Wormtail!" James smiles, sure enough Peter Pettigrew is worming his way down the corridor looking for his friends.

Gwen fades into the window and the green patchwork fields of British countryside. She doesn't feel like she belongs with the others, why did she join the team? Oh right, Sirius, she wanted to get him to notice her and now she's stuck with her father's voice in her head telling her that she will never amount to anything.

The cheery lady with the trolley rolls to their door, "Anything from the trolley my dears?"

A chorus of orders join the rumble of Gwen's stomach but she doesn't order anything to fill the hole in her stomach. At least she can control her appetite.

"Cheer up Gwenie, might never happen," smiles Sirius.

"The name's Gwen!" She objects but secretly she likes that Sirius feel that he can change her name to his liking.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two

The great hall is soon full to the rafters, with students waiting for the new school year to start. Gwen's stomach turns at the sight of all the food, dessert after dessert and piles of every imaginable food. She will have to eat something, a spud here and wafer thin slice of ham there, won't be enough to keep Lilly from slipping into lecture mode.

Gwen looks at Sirius who's flirting with some bint called Sara, slender Sara with her perfectly straight hair able to eat a piece of crackling with ease. Gwen retaliates by striking up conservation with Remus, she doesn't honestly think Sirius will notice, never mind care but she has to do something.

"You're not eating alot," Remus remarks.

Gwen shrugs, "I had a large lunch." It's a lie but it buys her time, not that Remus can pass judgement as he either eats like a pig or a mouse. But then, he is an odd boy full of confusing contradictions and his terribly sick mother.

Remus talks, she doesn't listen only looks at the Slytherin table where Snape is drooling over Lilly. Does no one fancy Gwen? She tries to push the negative pinched little voice to the back of her mind, stuffing some food down her throat to sweeten the deal.

Even Lupin's attention dwindles as the sorting begins.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

The stairs are full of students rushing to class. Gwen and her best friend Lilly are running late, they are never late. They take the secret passage to the corridor where Potions is, passing the dawdling Marauders with their odd nicknames for each other. James stares at Lily as they run past.

"Well at least we beat them," smiles Gwen pushing open the creaky door to Potions. Professor Slughorn smiles politely at them, Lilly is his favourite pupil and can get away with anything not that she ever puts as much as one toe out of line.

"Ten points from Gryffindor, I think," is all he says on the matter. Gwen tries to do the sums with the four Marauders late as well, that's thirty points just for tardiness.

Lilly sits next to Rita Skeeter, the busy body leaving Gwen to sit next to Severous Snape. Gwen takes a peek at Snape's book with his unreadable spidery squall, and turns to the right page. She isn't as good at Potions as she should be, she can brew the stuff and knows all the properties of the ingredients but it's not a great passion.

Snape however, seems to have a knack with the subject, he knows just how to prepare the ingredients to what way he stir it and in what direction. Ten minutes later the boys turn up, minus Peter Pettigrew who just couldn't make the grades. Something in Snape changes, as he puts up the barriers.

"You're very good at this," she says trying to offer him a branch.

He looks at her, down his magnificent nose. She's never really thought of his nose as magnificent before but it is. "Obviously," he says. "Or, I wouldn't be continuing it into the NEWTS year."

"No," Gwen smiles. She finds his brute honesty refreshing, why should people always follow the rules of polite conversation? "Quite," she adds.

"I think the lady was trying to pay you a compliment," James chips in nuzzling his way into the conversation. "Merlin knows why, but play nice Snevly or do I have to teach you some manners?"

"Nice one Prongs," sniggers Sirius.

"Don't you ever shut up?" Gwen asks, "I am capable of looking after myself if the situation arises."

"Oooh!" James minces, as he and his idiotic friends laugh at her defiance.

"Ignore them," Snape tells her.

"Oh I do," Gwen smiles at him, "Frequently."

The lesson comes to an end and everyone is in a rush for the first break of the day. Gwen asks Snape is he would like to help her with the homework Slug has just set them.

"Ok," he answers. "Meet me in the library before tea."

After Charms Gwen goes off to the library, she can't belief she is going to meet Snape. It's not like a date, or anything but she still feels those mixed emotions that flutter around in her stomach like butterflies. It's Snape, she tells herself.

She finds him in the Restricted Area, absorbed in a big tome. She admires his concentration; despite her grades she was never very good at studying. She blames her father, who could never sit still long enough to read a book. She doesn't disturb Snape only gets out her things ready for the learning.


	4. Chapter 4

The atmosphere in the library is even stuffier than usual; Gwen has been sitting in silence for ten minutes

The atmosphere in the library is even stuffier than usual; Gwen has been sitting in silence for ten minutes. Snape hasn't as much as looked at her since she sat next to him. She can feel a little giggle working its way up her throat but she gulps it down.

Snape looks at her, "I am not being a good tutor, am I?"

"No," she smiles.

"What are you having such problems with?" He asks.

"It's just the homework, it seems so much and I just need help with organising my notes," she says showing him her chaotic collection of classroom notes.

He looks at it with distain and she wonders how he can convey so much with just one look. "I find it hard to belief that you have made it to your NEWTS with your notes in such a state."

"What can I say; Lady Luck's a friend," she grins.

"That much is obvious," he says and if she didn't know any better she would swear that was almost a joke. He takes a closer look at the pile of parchment, "However the content shows promise, perhaps if you order them by date."

"Good, because I was worried that I'd need to start scribing in my text book,"

He snaps his book shut. "If you have a problem with my methods perhaps you can find someone else to help." He glares at her.

"I didn't mean to upset you Severous," she apologises even though she isn't sure why he is so hurt by her throw-away comment.

"Perhaps you should go,"

"Perhaps I should," she gathers her work and hurries off.

Severous spots a quill that she had dropped in her haste and picks it up. He didn't mean to scare her off but then maybe its better that way.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter five

Chapter five

_Thanks to everyone who has read and reviewed, sorry my updates aren't very regular. I'll try to be better. XOXO…_

Gwen rushes down to the great hall with her stomach hoping that it hasn't missed out on all the food. She slides in between Lilly and their friend Mary Waterborne, who for some reason has a huge crush on Remus Lupin.

"Where have you been?" Lilly asks.

"Thought I'd make a start on my homework for Slug," she answers trying not to stare at Severous as he makes his entrance into the hall. He storms over to the Slytherin table walking right past her and squeezes himself between Malfoy and Sirius' brother.

"You opted not to leave it to the morning before, as usual, because?"

She shrugs, "Thought I would need to stay on top of things this year, what with it being our sixth."

"Oh Merlin, it would appear that Moony has finally rubbed off," James smirks.

"Shame it wasn't on you Prongs," Sirius smiles nudging him. "You might not have to get Moony to do your essays for you."

Gwen smiles, "Am I take it, that Remus doesn't do yours then?"

"Of course he does, what good is having the brightest boy in the year being your friend if you have to do your own homework?" He smiles in that smarmy charming way of his. His smile has a power all of its own and what makes it worse that he knows it and isn't shy about using it.

"It's nice to feel wanted," Remus smiles wryly.

Mary blushes.

Sirius picks up on it and wraps his arm around Remus, "Oh I'd say so!" It's only a joke but it shows the mean side of the seemingly playful Marauders, you can never show sign of weakness in front of them because they will use it against you.

"Got something to say Black?" Gwen asks defiantly.

"Not to you,"

"Hey, you two cut it out!" James kicks in, "The dinner table is no place for a lover's tiff."

"Tell that to my parents," smiles Peter. Peter is usually quiet, happy to watch the world go by but when he does talk he's funny. Gwen wonders if she could sit by and watch the world leave her behind.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

Time has passed and Gwen is trying to get on with her life, if Snape doesn't want a friend then she should just give up. Any way what with the first game of the quidditch season upon her Gwen has more important things to worry about, especially since Sirius Black's ego has swelled so much since he started dating Sara that his nimble broom may break under the weight. He really is a twat, how could she be so obsessed with him? Oh right, he is gorgeous and cool.

She pulls on her brown dragon hide gloves; her belly is a bag of nerves even though she hasn't got much to worry about as they are playing against Hufflepuff. She has always felt empathy for those unfortunate few that are placed in the forth house destined for well nothing, as they aren't the brightest or bravest but then at least they aren't in Slytherin. It was stupid of her to think about the green and silver scarf wearing students because a picture of Severus Snape pops into her head.

She goes out into the tunnel where she meets the other players on the team who are all boys. "Hey guys," she shrugs trying to play it cool.

"Are you nervous Gwenie?" Sirius asks with that mischievous glint in his grey eye.

"Nope, as long as your bloated head can get off the ground we should win without much of a problem." She grins. "I mean it's Hufflepuff!"

They mount their brooms and start the match of the day against their yellow rivals. The new Quidditch teacher is a young woman named Hootch who used to play for the English team; she blows the whistle and throws the ball into the air.

Watching from the narrator's box is Remus Lupin who is filling in for the boy who usually does it. "And there off, Black gets the ball first and heads down to the Hufflepuff hoops...Only to be hit by a bludger, good shot Jenkins... Pass it Siri for Merlin's sake!"

Gwen waits for him to pass but Black's arrogance wouldn't let him. She watches flabbergasted as Lloyd Puddlewinkle takes the ball but she soon catches up after him and snatches it back tucking it under her arm. She zooms down to the other end of the pitch dodging bludgers galore to the goal and scores.

"A brilliant move from our own Welsh dragon, you go girl!" Remus cheers making Gwen smile. "Ten points to Gryffindor!"

Gwen winks at the Hufflepuff keeper cheekily.

"What was that? Was that the Snitch?" Remus asks as James Potter and his opponent race off above the stands. Gwen has to admit that Potter has a skill on his broom that should make the crowd go wild, she doesn't have nearly as much talent but she isn't a spectator.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

Gwen knows that she should feel elated at winning the match. She knows that it is a step closer to winning the tournament and how good it will look on her resume to have won it three years on a trot. Only Gwen doesn't feel elated, the praise of others seems less important somehow because Snape doesn't meet her eye in the courtyard.

"Oh look Prangs the only thing that can make this day any better," Black smiles looking at Severous, "A spot of Sneverous bashing."

James smiles at him, "It is generally my favourite time of the day." He says taking out his wand from his back pocket.

Severous sees them and draws his own wand ready to duel, what happened that day by the lake will not happen again. He will not allow Potter to embarrass him anymore. "Expelliamus!" He yells at the same time as Potter leading their beams to meet in the middle.

"Specta..."

"Expelliamus!" Gwen snaps flicking the wand out of James' hand. She couldn't let him hurt Snape. Only now the Marauders have a new enemy as they all face her.

Snape looks at her confused, wondering why she helped him trying to guess her motives. He takes her hand overcoming his coyness because he knows she has made a terrible error, she got involved. "Run," he tells her ignoring the glowing sensation caused by her hand in his.

She nods acting entirely on instinct. She and Snape enter the castle running up the stairs of the clock tower still hand in hand being chased by the Marauders. They run until they can't run anymore and they collapse with stitches and a severe case of the giggles.

Gwen has never heard Severous laugh before and wouldn't have believed him to process a sense of humour if he wasn't rolling in laughter in the secret passageway. It's a beautiful sound and it lights up his face. She leans her forehead against his and kisses his soft lips. His eyes go wide with surprise but neither pull away from the kiss, his hand snakes up around the back of her head stroking her hair.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

_Wide spaces are used to express a change of time, stick with it and all will make sense xoxo_

"Have you seen Gwen?"

"Nope Lilly I haven't," Scarlet answers looking at her green nail varnish worried that it's beginning to chip. She hasn't seen Gwen since watching the quidditch game from the crowds and she was very impressed by James' skill on his broom, and wonders if she should try to get him to invite her to The Three Broomsticks. They are off to Hogsmeade next month and she needs someone to go with since Sirius moved on from their brief and almost too passionate affair.

"This is important I haven't seen Gwen for hours," Lilly snaps out of concern for her missing friend. Gwen is impulsive and often set to self-destruct.

"She's with Snape," James sighs.

"What?"

"She stopped Prongs from attacking him and then they scarpered," Sirius answers. "You don't think he's soft on him, do you?" His you sounds more like a ya, which annoys Scarlet because he's a lot more upper class than he acts anyone would think he was common.

"What Snape?" Lilly doesn't want to seem too judgemental not until Gwen has a chance to defend herself but how can anyone like Snape with his acid tongue and oily charm? In fact Snape is a living embodiment of all that is wrong with the Slytherins.

"No I meant Wormtail!" Sirius sneers nudging Peter with his elbow making Lilly question why Peter always puts up with being the butt of most of Sirius' jokes.

"Yeah she can't get enough of me," Peter smiles dumbly. That must be why he doesn't mind being the joke because he's so stupid that he can't see that his so called friends are laughing at him rather than with him.

Meanwhile by the lake under a tree Gwen curls up in Severous' arms. She has never been as content as she is now and tells him as such. He smiles kissing her forehead and telling her that she is very sweet both literally and figuratively.

Lilly waits for her in the common room in front of the fire reading through her History of Magic text book because despite of the boring Professor it's actually quite interesting especially to Muggle-born Lilly. Reading the text book is like exploring a secret world that is just hers and has nothing to do with her hateful sister who would never know that there was a Goblin war. It isn't that she wants to be separated from her Muggle roots but everyone else seems to take all those things for granted and Lilly never wants that.

"What are you doing still up?" Gwen asks.

"I'm allowed unlike you, didn't you get spotted?" Lilly asks as she puts her book on the table face down so she doesn't lose her place.

"Nah, apparently all the Prefects are too busy doing their homework to be patrolling tonight," Gwen smiles sweetly not even one of Lilly's lectures can wipe away the happiness that she has she has been brewing all day. "I'm off to bed, see you in the morning."


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

_Thanks again for all of the reviews, it helps and to answer a question to add a new chapter to a story go into your profile upload your chapter to be added in documents, go into the story click the heading that says content/chapters and add the document and ta-da one more chapter. Xoxo_

Gwen is not a morning person and is usually still dosing off at the breakfast table. The Marauders give her dirty looks over their toast and bacon but she doesn't even mind, she's done trying to impress people if they have a problem with her then it's their problem not hers. She is far too busy counting the hours until she can be alone with Severous for it to really bother her any way.

She can't stop looking over to him wondering how she could go so long not seeing the dark beauty about him. His long dark hair falls like a curtain in front of his eyes as he plays with his food. He is like a raven majestically pecking at his toast. He catches her looking and nods holding her gaze daring her to look away but she doesn't.

The hall of noisy eaters disappears and they are just in that gaze. She's almost afraid of the power of their connection and how it has changed her world. Has she changed his too? Does he like her as much as she likes him? Is it all in her head?

She frowns wishing she could shut out all those niggling questions that run through her head.

"Gwen, why are you ogling at Snape?" Lilly demands making Gwen cough out some of her tea. "Are you too going out?" She asks.

"Does it matter if we are?"

"Well I'm supposed to be your best friend and you're keeping secrets from me, which matters a lot." Lilly argues picking up her things and leaving.

Gwen follows her, determined that years of friendship isn't going to end because she couldn't trust her best friend. She was so scared that Lilly would judge her and not want to be friend that she has landed up in this mess.

Severous touches her shoulder, "What's going on?" He asks in that deep sexy voice of his.

"Lilly's mad at me because I didn't tell her about us," she sighs.

"Why not, are you that ashamed of being with me?"

"No, of course I'm not but you called her you-know-what last year and well she thinks you're a bigoted prig." She explains.

"A bigoted prig,' did she say that?" He asks holding her shoulder hard.

"No, but it's what she's thinking and you're hurting me Sev," she winces as he releases his grip. "I have to go to her she's my best friend." She doesn't want to stay when he's like this.

"Do I scare you?" He asks.

"No," she smiles kissing him on the lips lightly. "I'll see you in Hogsmeade, okay?"

He nods, "Until later then my pet."

She runs after Lilly finding her in their dorm packing her brown leather satchel for the day. "Lil', can we talk about this?" Gwen asks.

Lilly slams her novel in her bag, "I know I can but the question is can you?"

"Okay, so I'm kind of seeing Severous and it's been going on for a while." She sits down and tells Lilly absolutely everything including her plans for the day.

"Really, you're taking him to the tea shop?" Lilly asks.

"Why, you think it's a bad idea?"

"No, it's just Snape."

"I know it's crazy but he makes me feel special,"


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

_Nb: the Welsh I got from the University of Wales that however mean I used it right doesn't so forgive me if you know Welsh no offense was meant. Xoxo _

Severous Snape looks out of place in the tea rooms. His pale skin and dark hair tied back in a ponytail seem to argue with the pink cushions and drapes that look like a Divination classroom on steroids. Gwen wants to laugh but knows Sev doesn't need to be the butt of even more jokes so she doesn't.

"Would you like a cup of tea?" He asks.

She nods, "Nothing like a cuppa is there?" She smiles, "My mum used to stay up just to have that last cup of tea." She hasn't talked about her mother before because it's too private to tell just anyone.

"Did she die when you were very young?" Sev asks in a way that is far from pushy.

"Yes, she was quite the witch I don't really remember but my Aunt used to tell me about her, she blamed my father for her death like he could have stopped it. I think that's why he's always been so hard on me because he wants me to be able to look after myself." She looks at him, "What about your parents, you never speak about them,"

"There's nothing to tell we just don't get on," he sounds defensive so she lets the subject go.

"Maybe we should get some cake," she suggests instead trying to paste over the gap that's pushing them apart. Only she isn't hungry, she can't remember the last time she was actually hungry enough for cake but she wanted to say something to get beyond that look in his eyes.

"You don't eat cake," he says cutting through the crap with that razor edged tongue of his.

"No, you're right I don't I just wanted to fill the silence," she smiles finding his frank manner a pleasant change everyone else would try to ignore her eating disorder. "Can we go somewhere else, this place is weird."

They are the only people not kissing in the crowded cafe but the pink hearts and all that nonsense isn't very them. He looks relieved, "What about the Nag's Head?" He asks.

"Would they let us in?" She asks, no one ever goes there they all flock to the Broomsticks like there is safety in numbers and with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and his followers maybe there's some truth in that assumption.

"Place is too quiet to afford to turn away custom," Sev smiles wrapping her tweed coat over her shoulders.

She smiles kissing him, "Thanks," she didn't think she would like being looked after but then she has been wrong before. They hold hands as they leave the overbearing tea shop, Gwen doesn't mind if people spot her she's happy to be with him. She does grip his hand a little tighter as they pass Zonko's because that's the notorious Marauder's spot they think they are all so cool with their practical jokes but it just seems so childish and pathetic.

"Oh look its Snevly and the traitor," Peter spits revelling a horrible side to his usually subdued personality. He points his wand at him, "You were supposed to be our friend and you're with him, he called Lilly a Mugblood and you're holding his bloody hand!"

"That was last year Pete, people change like I never realised you were such a wanker before," she says her hand reaching for her own wand.

Sirius and James spot them, "Oh look Wormtail's found some sport," he sneers.

"Sport?" Gwen asks throwing his word back at him, "You think this is some sort of game, and you wonder why Lilly doesn't want to be anywhere near you when you act like this?" She looks at Remus who's standing in the shadows of the doorway, "You got something to add Lupin or do you merely like to watch?"

Remus says nothing he acts like he's so superior but when it comes to it he is commended by his inaction.

"Come on Sev, let's leave the children to their pathetic games, she says turning her back on them muttering under her breath in Welsh Sev doesn't catch it all only something along the lines of mydylu, which he thinks means cock and it makes him laugh.

"What did you say?" James asks calling after her, "You got something to say at least say so we can all understand you."

"It's not my fault that you're an ignorant bigot," she sighs walking off.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

There is snow on the ground covering the castle in white. Gwen doesn't like the cold but Severus is worth braving the elements for, she puts on her big fur coat and walking shoes because the ice is treacherous at least three people fell over this morning in the courtyard. Lily is excited about going home for Christmas and Gwen wishes that she could share her friend's excitement but Christmas in the Llewellyn household isn't exactly fun.

"Are you going to meet Snape?" Lily asks.

"Of course," Gwen smiles, "I have to give him his present," she hopes to Merlin that he likes it. Sev is hardly the easiest person to buy for but hopefully he will like the book that she took from her father's extensive library. She wrapped it simply in brown parcel paper with string and a sprig of mistletoe.

"What does one buy for dear Severus?" Lily asks teasingly.

"A book," Gwen sighs because it doesn't sound like the greatest gift in the world. "Did you buy James anything Miss Evans?"

Lily actually blushes, "No, of course not, why would I have done that? I don't even like Potter!"

Gwen laughs, "Lily you're adorable," she kisses her friend on the forehead. "I'll see you at dinner," she picks up the present and skips down the stairs.

She finds the Marauders in the common room lounging out like they owe the place. They go completely silent as she walks past with Sirius' eyes bearing into her like daggers or fire pokers as they make her skin feel hot. They haven't forgiven her for her betrayal. She keeps her head down and continues. The stairs move away just as she reaches them so she has to wait for them to go by again. She never thought that she could get used to the school back in her first year she was always getting lost and now she knows enough secret passages to get by.

Severus is waiting in their regular spot by the lake that has now frozen over. His dark hair and dark cloak are the perfect contrast to the snowy white background. He is engrossed in some giant tome so he doesn't see her. She sneaks up behind him.

"Bella I have told you before..." He looks at her and there's a flash of anger in those gorgeous eyes. "You should not sneak up on people my love," he smiles trying too hard to be kind.

"You thought I was Bella?" She asks trying to hide her jealously unconvincingly. "Does she often sneak up on you when I'm not looking?" She should not be asking that, he is hers and she should be able to accept it as easy as she accepts that soon the spring will conquer the snow.

Snape doesn't help matters, "Sometimes," he smiles. The jealousy she is so blatantly displaying fascinates him, fancy two such beautiful women fighting over him. How did he ever get so popular?

She pouts, "I was going to give you your present but I don't think I'll bother now!" He's mocking her and she doesn't like it, he's meant to be the one not some slippery Slitherine.

His cold hand strokes her cheek, "There is no one else for me," he declares and his sweet words comfort her. He kisses her and she closes her eyes lost in his lips, Severus however is looking over her shoulder to where Bella is smiling at him.

Gwen pulls from him her face a picture of bliss, "I'm sorry Sev, but I love you so much and I can't help wanting to keep you all to myself." She smiles her head on his narrow shoulders.

"You have me," he smiles. "What can I do to prove my love?" He muses.

"Like your gift," she suggests. She hopes that he likes it and her hands tremble as she hands it over. "Merry Christmas," she smiles.

He takes it and tears gently at the brown paper; he likes the elegance of her simple wrapping because sappiness is not his thing. Inside is a big ancient book that is so aged that the pages have turned gold, his long fingers trace the engravings that read Occulemcy. He looks at her with wonder, "How did you acquire this? It is hardly a common book?"

"I took it from my father's library, do you really like it?" She answers wishing that she could be more confident. Bella wouldn't be so worried or feel so under scrutiny, she would be comfortable in his gaze.

He kisses her again and once more his lips silence her worries emptying her mind of any doubts that harbour in the dark corners. "It is perfect, just like the woman who gave it to me."

She feels her cheeks heat up with colour making her look like a beetroot at his compliment. "Ooh my turn," she smiles.

Severus takes a small velvet box the colour of the night sky in London where the pollution stops it from getting completely black. He places it in her hand with a smile, "I hope you like it."

She opens it finding a stunning silver pendent heart with one green and one red stone side by side. "Oh Sev it's beautiful," she beams. "Help me put it on?" She asks.

He takes it out of its box and wraps it around her delicate neck, "Our houses entwined for eternity." He tells her knowing that if his friends could see him now they would tease him relentlessly for being so soppy but he really is in love with her. He never thought he would ever love someone like he used to love Evans but Gwen is perfect and sweet, she's also willing to stick up for him to her friends.

She leans against him, "I wish that I didn't have to go home, I could quite happily just stay here like this." She sighs with all those lovely Welsh vowels. She sounds like a lullaby and Severus wishes that she could be in his bed whispering him to sleep.

"You could stay here, if you really wanted to, you could stay here with me," he smiles and there's an edge to his velvet voice. "I'm sure your father wouldn't as much as notice,"

"Sev, I have to go home," Gwen smiles thinly. She kisses him, "I'll send you plenty of owls ok?" She's on her feet now and already walking towards the castle where Sirius Black is waiting for her. He's leaning against one of the archways that lead into the main corridor looking all cool and sexy. "Oh Merlin's beard now what?" She moans because he has that naughty boy look in his grey eyes.

He says nothing but just stares at her so she shrugs and goes to walk past but he blocks her path. "Oh grow up Padfoot," she glares but every time she goes to move he is one step ahead, "Don't make me jinx you," she warns reaching for her wand.

He pushes her against the stone wall, "You're too good for Snevly Gwen," he smiles stroking her face. This time last year she would be melting for him but now, she loves Severus and no one else is getting a look in. She spent so long waiting and wanting but now here he is the great Sirius Black wanting her and she's no longer is under his spell. She pushes him away. "You're choosing Snape over me?"

"Yes," she nods, "That's exactly what I'm doing." She holds his hand to her cheek, "You had your chance honey and you blew it try not to miss me too much." She walks away from him.

Bellatrix LeStrange wraps an arm around Snape's skinny shoulders, "I did try to warn you that she couldn't be trusted," she smiles as her hideous blood traitor cousin has his hands all over poor innocent little Gwen. "She's not like us love."

Severus can feel his blood boil, "She said that she loved me."

"She lied, how can anyone love you?" Malfoy teases, "But of course I could be wrong," he looks at the book in Snape's hand that belongs in the Llewellyn library. "There's only one to check the lady's intentions."

Snape nods, "Occulemcy."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

Jigsaw lands on the bed with a thud and starts to purr in Gwen's ear. She smiles stretching out tickling her cat's head right between the ears, "Morning" she yawns rolling over to look at her alarm clock, "It's too early," she moans as the clock says that it's only just gone six, "Go get Fletcher to feed you," she sinks back into her soft pillow knowing that Fletcher will deal with her cat.

Fletcher is the fifth generation of house elf that has worked for the family but only the second to be free, he stays because he wants to and despite his misgivings her father even pays him. He is an excellent cook and Gwen loves him like he's a member of the family.

She goes back to sleep and in her dreams she is at Hogwarts with her Severus. It is a pleasant dream that soon turns sour as Bella arrives and steals him. She wakes up in a cold sweat and runs herself a bath to try to calm her. It's amazing how much good a good old soak can do and by the time that Fletcher calls for her she has regained her Christmas spirit.

"Good morning miss," he smiles. His voice is creaky with age as is his back.

"Good morning Fletcher," she beams back following him down the spiral stairs to the dining room. She always wanted to eat in the kitchen as a child favouring the company of the servants over the formality of eating with her father and the endless codes of conduct.

He stands, "Good morning Gwyneth," he nods in a way that isn't exactly happy.

She kisses his cheek, "You too father," she sits laying the napkin on her lap. The long mahogany table is full with fruit and cereals, there is too much for just the two of them and she sighs. She's going to have eat something; she picks up a grapefruit and halves it. Usually her father reads the Daily Prophet at the table and she merely pretends to eat but today his eyes are on her.

She starts to scoop out the flesh with the silver spoon; she isn't stupid she knows her relationship with food isn't healthy but she just can't face eating. She forces the fruit down and can picture Severus' face in her mind all full of concern. He wouldn't want her to be unhealthy; he would want her to be strong. There isn't even any conversation to hide behind; one does not talk at the table. Merlin she wants to be back at the school where every meal is full of noise and chaos.

They finish breakfast, "what plans do you have for the day?" He asks.

"Studying," she answers knowing that any other answer would get her into trouble.

"Brilliant," he smiles, "I've a few errands that I wanted you to do for the dinner party, I have a list but you will have to go to Gringotts to take out the required funds."

"Yes father," she nods glad for a reason to be outside even if last minute shopping on Christmas Eve isn't exactly the best thing in the world. She takes the list and travels via flue powder to Diagon Alley.

She stands up dusting herself off wishing that she could apperate already. She shoves her hands inside her fur coat because the wind is chilly. She walks amongst the crowd towards the bank; the bank is a very imposing building that still manages to make her feel so very small in its shadow. The bank unlike the muggles never closes, there are decorations however indicating the season. The Llewellyn vault is a short trip by cart and is as large as it is well stacked.

"Father wanted this much exactly," she says handing the dwarf the parchment.

"Of course," he goes and gets the right amount.

"Thank you," she smiles taking the money.

She leaves the bank and starts her shopping. She stops by the Leaky Cauldron because she needs a drink of Butter beer to warm her up. The Cauldron is full but she manages to find a little table in the corner by the fire where she can keep an eye on the door.

The door opens and in stroll Potter and Black sharing a joke between them. Gwen tries to hide and not to stare but when he's laughing Sirius looks even hotter, she hates that she still finds him so attractive. She's no naive child so she knows the difference between a simple crush and love but things would be a lot easier if her legs didn't turn to jelly as soon as she looks at him.

"Oh look its Gwenie," James smiles as they sit opposite her, "On your own?" He asks.

"Sev spends Christmas at Hogwarts," she answers. She hasn't really spoken to them off the pitch since the incident in Hogsmead and she has to admit that she misses them. They may be annoying and pig headed but they've been her friends for years. "I wish you could just accept us as a couple, it would make life a bit easier."

"But it's Snape," James shudders, "Have you...well you know?"

She smiles, "That would be between me and Severus," she answers. She knows exactly what it is that he's asking and she hasn't done that yet, at least not with Severus.

"Oh so that's a big ole no," Sirius teases smiling, "Although the thought of you and him doing that is enough to put me of my drink."

"He's really lovely when you get to know him, he brought me this for Christmas," she smiles showing them the necklace, "Isn't it pretty."

"Oh yeah Snape's the best," James glares. "He must only pretend to be a dick." He mutters under his breath making Sirius laugh.

"And you don't?" She smiles, "Come on guys I know it's crazy but I do love him and he makes me happy."

"So you're pleading insanity as defence?" Sirius asks, he's been reading Peter's muggle crime novels and it's affected his brain.

"What?" She asks, "I don't need a defence, I've not broken any rules that exist outside of your head. Look fellas I'm going to go, you two have a great holiday and I'll see you back at school, okay?" She finishes her drink and goes back to her shopping.

The Hogwarts express pulls into Hogsmead station and the students get off the red train. Gwen is arm in arm with Lily as they catch up; Petunia was being a right cow as usual but otherwise everything was good in the Evans household and Gwen doesn't go into too much detail because she hates her life. There is however one good thing about her holiday and it's waiting for her at the school; she gets to be reunited with her love.

Severus watches the parade of students arrive from the clock tower. He has been doing a lot of thinking this past two weeks and the thoughts in his head have not been pleasant. He has to make a choice.

Bella wearing a slinky black dress made of lace curls herself around him, "She's not like us Severus," she smiles. "She's a Gryffindor, they don't have what it takes to be truly great not like us and she might be a pure blood but look she chooses to be friends with."

"Mugbloods and blood-traitors," Malfoy answers for him. He doesn't particularly like Severus but the boy has potential, all that anger and suspicion could make him a perfect brother if he is well groomed. "Including Potter and Black," he has interest in the boys but Gwen, well she is family.

Severus growls. Since he started Potter and his friends have made his life hell, it was only Lily who cared and who helped but now even she isn't there and he blames that on them. Then there was Gwen. She is like a light in the dark and to suddenly lose that one joy to Sirius is more than he can bear. He would do anything to keep her by his side.

"Do you want to keep her Severus?" Malfoy asks his voice as slippery as the snake that represents their house. "Does she mean so much to you that you're willing to do whatever it takes?" He loves it when a plan comes together.

Severus nods, "Yes, I would do anything."

"Then let us help you," Bella smiles stroking his cheek. "Come on love let's try to snare your girl back, pretty little thing isn't she?" She leads him to the Slytherin dorms.

Malfoy follows them with a big liquid smile on his pale face.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter Thirteen

_For those who don't know peanuting a tie is when the label is peeled off as a rite of passage or least it was in my school. Xoxo _

The ceiling of the great hall is starry and Gwen finds it beautiful, she used to watch it change day to day but things lose their charm after time. She just got used to it but for some reason it seems important now, she spies Severus squished between Malfoy and Goyle. She wants to go over and kiss him right here and now but Mary is talking to her in detail about a dream she had about Remus Lupin.

"And then he kissed me in front of everyone," she blushes as they reach the table. She would never say anything in front of the man himself but it's not like everyone doesn't know that she's madly in love with Moony anyway.

"That's a great present," Gwen smiles sitting next to Lily. She is used to covering for her friends when it comes to their bizarre fixations with the Marauders. "Anyone else get anything nice for crimbo?" Everyone starts to talk over each other about tickets to quidditch games and other brilliant sounding presents she even shows off her new necklace.

It's nice to get everyone talking again and it's just like old times. They can all be friends again even if it's just for the evening.

"Are you going to Slug's dinner party tomorrow?" Lily asks as they head up to the girl's dorm.

"Merlin no," Gwen shudders. "I can't think of anything worse than having to answer questions about my father. Why don't you just ask James?" She smiles but she knows that she's just crossed the mark. She's just edgy because Sev hasn't even said hello to her yet and now it's too late. The look on Lily's face is that of shock and embarrassment that fills Gwen with shame. "I'm sorry Lil's I just miss my Sev, "she smiles.

Lily nods, "He couldn't take his eyes off you and he wasn't the only one."

Gwen looks at her, "Who was the other?" She doesn't care but it's nice to get a little attention even if it is unwanted.

"Sirius," Lily smiles, "And you didn't even notice, that's great Gwen."

Sirius was looking at her, she would have skipped at the news a few months ago but she shouldn't be so happy about it now. She smiles as she climbs into her bed under the covers with no intention of sleep not when the dorm is alive with girly gossip about those silly little things that when you're a sixteen year old girl seem so important.

The next day brings her first potions class of the year and she can't wait to see Sev, she even styles her hair differently. They take the passage behind the portrait to the classroom trying their best to be on time as they know the points in the Gryffindor jar isn't as full as it should be. Sev is talking with his friends and he blanks her when she says hello.

"Sev, did I do something wrong?" She asks but he doesn't even look at her. "Severus?"

Slug opens the door and lets them all in. Lilly sits next to Mary right at the front; she really is a total bookworm. Gwen might be clever but she is no boffin, her tie never needed anyone to peanut it and she certainly never sits at the front. She picks a table in the middle hoping that he'd sit next to her but of course he doesn't. She takes out her textbook and the new pheasant tail quill that Fletcher made as a present.

Bella makes an origami bird out of parchment and flies it at her table she opens it to find a nasty note about she's ugly and officially dumped. Gwen will not be so easy put off not after everything that has happened between them. She looks over at Severus who is furiously scratching notes into that book of his and he doesn't meet her glance making a lump form in her throat. This can't be happening.

"Thirty points from Gryffindor for lateness," Slug sighs as the door bangs open and three of the Marauders enter lead by a defeated looking Remus. "Now to make up some lost points Miss Llewellyn can you tell me what this is?" He asks holding up a curious looking seed.

"Is it a bezoar?" She says at a guess.

"Quite right m'dear, ten points granted to Gryffindor," he smiles. "Now can anyone tell me why you might want one if you're ever offered a drink from a stranger?"

Gwen knows this one and her hand jots up in the air, "To save you from being poisoned," she smiles desperate for some points.

"That's another ten points, well done, no doubt your father knows all about them," he smiles getting sort of misty eyes when he talks about her father.

"Yes sir," she nods.

Sirius who is now sitting next to her smiles "Brains as well as beauty, shame to see them wasted."

She gives his leg a swift kick under the table, "Shut up," she chuckles.

The class finishes and she puts her things away slowly wanting to wait for everyone else to leave so she can talk to Severus. He is walking with his friends and yet she follows him, "Sev?" She calls taking his arm but he just shrugs her off. "What's occurring?"

He looks at her, "Meet me by the lake."

She nods, "Ok," she watches him walk on and hurries off to the lake for their free period. She puts down her brown leather satchel and sits down he isn't here yet but Jigsaw finds his mistress and rubs against her shins. "Hey boy, caught any mice yet?" She smiles but the smile doesn't meet her eyes. She looks around her hoping to see him but he's not here so she takes out her transfiguration text book and starts to read. She gets to the fifth page of the new chapter and shivers with the cold.

A raven lands on her knee and drops a note on her lap before taking off again, she unrolls the parchment to find that he isn't coming. "Great," she sighs holding her face in her hands. She remembers what her father always says about dusting herself off and carrying on when she fell over so she does just that. She has a class to go to after all.

She races up to transfiguration and throws her arms around Lily needing her dearest friend to comfort her. "He stood me up," she says wondering exactly where her fighting spirit went. She's the welsh dragon for Merlin's sake.

"I'm sure there was a reason," Lily smiles doing that lovely all too understanding thing that she does all too well.

"Like he's bored of me," she sighs.

"What with your neuroticism, how can anyone be bored of you?" She teases in a nice way that only good friends can get away with. "You're just being paranoid."

Gwen nods, "Yeah, I do that. Don't I?" She plasters a huge smile on her face to keep up appearances. She just can't shake the feeling that he's trying to avoid her like he's hiding something from her and it hurts too much for words.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

Gwen is trying her hardest not to fall asleep as Professor Binns drones on about some ancient war between the trolls and giants. She can barely keep her eyes open they are that heavy that she is considering casting some sort of charm to keep them from falling. She hasn't been sleeping well at all, what with everything whizzing about in her head driving her crazy.

"Honey, are you okay?" Lily asks.

"Wake me up when he's finished," she yawns. She's just about to go to sleep when she hears Bella giggling softly; so she turns to see Severus with his hand on her knee. The anger descends like a thick fog and it makes her hands roll up into a fist. She closes her eyes trying to block them out and calm down, and it's like she can't even breathe. She tries to count to ten but everything is pushing down on her and she's sinking with the strain. She will be out of the little classroom soon enough.

"Gwen?"

She looks at her best friend tired of always seeing that concern in her green eyes. "I'm fine Lil's," she sighs because shouldn't this be the happiest time of her life? Merlin that's one depressing thought that it will just go downhill from here. "I'm just bored," she hopes that just this once Lily can drop it.

Bella laughs again and it grates Gwen's nerves, a fact that isn't helped by the feeling that the Slytherins are laughing at her. She even goes to the resort of actually looking at her text book, but seriously how can a war be so mundane? Aren't battles supposed to be interesting or something?

An origami bird lands gracefully in front of her and she opens it quickly to find a cryptic note, _I can't stop thinking about last night J x. _She looks over to Potter who has gone a lovely shade of pink and smiles.

"Love I think this is for you," she says sliding the note to its intended precipitant. "So what happened last night exactly?"

"Nothing," Lily blushes.

"Oh come on spill. I wouldn't be much of a mate if I wasn't willing to squeeze every last little juicy bit of gossip out of you, now would I?" She needs some good news right about now and Lily getting secretive notes from Potter is very good news in deed.

"I'll fill you in later,"

"You better,"

They are finally let out of the classroom and Bella is still laughing, just what is so funny exactly? Gwen looks at her to find her wrapped around Severus and whispering in his earlobe like a real couple. She tries to ignore them and hurries past them.

"That's it run away," Bella calls after her. "And Severus never thought you were that funny, I think that you're hysterical." To proof her point she cackles in her face.

Gwen has tried to rise above it despite her anger and act like a reasonable adult. "You should have let me pass LeStrange." She says darkly reaching for her wand and hitting Bella with a super quick Stupefy that stuns everyone else as well. "Really you should have let me go!" She takes a last look at Severus and just walks away.

Severus pulls away from Bella, "This plan doesn't seem to be working," he says darkly.

"But you saw for yourself," Bella smiles. "She was willing to fight for you Severus, and that means she still cares."

Severus nods kissing her cheek, "You're absolutely right." He walks off feeling reassured not knowing that his so called friends have their own agendas.

"I do admire your work ethic sister dear," Narcissa smiles taking Bella by the arm. "I mean letting that filthy half-blood touch you, it's just disgusting"

"He might be spoilt fruit but he's still ready to be picked," Bella smiles cackling with laughter. "Now let us pay your darling Malfoy a status report."

Mary closes the door to the dorm, "So come on then ladies dish the gossip already," she smiles. "Or I will just have to eat all of these by myself," she says holding the big bag of sweets from Honeydukes. Gwen puts down her magazine and Lily closes her book. "Okay then who wants to start?"

"Well James and I met in the astrology tower last night," Lily smiles; she picks up a handful of every flavour beans. "We were both doing our rounds and well I thought I heard something so we went to investigate." Her face screws up as she finds a flavour she doesn't like, "Ear wax." She frowns.

"And then?" Gwen asks.

"We started fighting as usual," Lily blushes and in her head she can see it all so clearly. _The astrology tower is breezy and James is throwing stones out of the window. She tells him off and he just laughs at her, she says that as head boy he should be making a good example. He says that he is making an example of how school should be fun, she tells him off because he never takes anything serious. He argues that he takes her seriously and she asks him to proof it. He kisses her and his lips are warm and she loses herself into the moment and years of rivalry and fighting turn into the hottest of kisses._

"He tasted like cocoa," she smiles finishing her story. "He was a really good kisser."

"Do you want to see him again?" Mary asks smiling.

"Yes," she answers. "We're going to Hogsmead together at the weekend."

"Just don't distract him too much we're playing against Slitherine on Saturday," Gwen laughs. "Oh honey I'm so happy for you. What about you Mary, any progress with Lupin?" She asks changing the subject from Slitherine Gryffindor interaction.

"Not with Lupin no," she smiles. "But there is someone else, and he actually seems to like me too."

"Well I hear that helps," Gwen smiles. "So who is your mystery fella?"

"Mark Hodges, he's in Ravenclaw and very nice he is too," she smiles, "We met in the library whilst I was sort of following Remus and I knocked a book off a shelf and it landed on his head. Poor thing, the book looked kind of heavy."

Gwen hugs her, "That's some impression you made, huh?"

"That's what Mark said," she laughs helping herself to a chocolate. "He also said that I have the most beautiful smile that he's ever seen."

"That's brilliant," Lily smiles. "So come on then Gwyneth feel free to share."

The atmosphere changes and it's like the room gets a lot colder, Mary even shivers. "I think Sirius is trying to add me to his collection," Gwen sighs. She puts her handful of sweets back in the bag, "Maybe I should just shag him and get it over and done with,"

"What about Snape?" Mary asks feeling confused. "Do you even like Sirius anymore?"

"I still fancy him," she admits. She stands up and goes to the window, "As far as Snape, I don't know? I'm beginning to doubt that it was anything in the first place, it wasn't that long ago he swore that he loved you Lil's."

"But he made you so happy," Lily argues. She's worried because Gwen doesn't turn around she just stands facing the window her shoulders shake and Lily is just about ready to set James on Snape for hurting her friend this much.


End file.
